A client asked me to write an article on ADHD and relationships, offering tips and positive strategies for making friends with ADHDers, overcoming anger and dealing with depression. Okay, here is my brief overview of those three problems, and a tip for beating the socks off each and every one of those problems.
ADHD and Relationships: How To Make Friends with ADHDers
People who have Attention Deficit-Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) can be hard to befriend or to keep as friends. Their penchant for acting like the proverbial space cadet, and their tendency to not listen, or to make off-hand remarks that can sting, keep them in trouble with the friends and co-workers, and keep them from making friends.
The remedy for ADHD and relationships in your life? Be patient and flexible. Avoid taking things personally, and strive to be understanding. The worst thing you can do is to over-react. Please don't judge him or her, and remember their behavior doesn't always accurately reflect their intentions.
In a relationship with an ADHDer? Put your seat belt on...keep your sense of humor and sit down and start talking about the ADHD. Decide fair rules for having conversations and relationships. Learn all you can about ADHD and be prepared to counter misunderstandings with good, honest communication. By improving your understanding of ADHD and relationships, you’ll enhance all your ADHD-relationships.
Anger Management: Tips for Overcoming Anger
Anger management may seem like rocket science, but it isn’t. Begin with a hard-core critique of your attitude. Most angry folks inherited anger-producing ways of seeing the world, situations and events. They tend to view things in a pessimistic way. Negative thinking kicks in, whenever there's conflict, and soon the emotions begin to soar. Tempers flare.
The person feels trapped, hurt or misunderstood, and reacts by getting mad and lashing out.
A simple but powerful anecdote, from the anger management tool box, is to vent a little anger when it starts building up. Don't let it simmer. Avoid waiting. Get it out before you blow . . .
before it reduces you to the status of a disgusting and obnoxious petty tyrant.
Anger is normal. It's okay, as long as you don't allow it to become pathological.
A new study reveals that those who cuss moderately are healthier emotionally than those who don't. Interesting, huh? Seems it's okay to express anger and hurt or disappointment. Say it, get it out and watch it disappear. That’s possibly the easiest and most effective anger management technique.
But . . . hold onto it and look out . . . you will eventually blow! And you'll take it out on your loved ones or those who are closest to you. Be honest with yourself about the ways your anger control problem can and does traumatize others. Commit yourself to changing it before you make everyone in your life miserable.
Depression Help: A Simple Way to Decrease Depression
Getting depression help may seem hard, but it is, in fact, pretty straight-forward, most of the time (unless you have severe clinical depression . . . and then you will need medication). What can you do to kick the blues in the butt?
Here are several cognitive steps you can take to find depression help:
By changing the way you look at problems, you can also change the desired outcome. And, you'll feel better. An optimistic point of view makes perfect sense for decreasing depression and getting depression help the natural way . . . starting with your thought process.
Most depressed people see the world darkly. They impose gloom and doom onto any scenario, and their dark way of thinking increases or causes depression.
But if you stop perceiving situations and events so negatively, you will start to feel more hopeful. Yes, optimism is a potent anti-depressant. And may give you the upper hand in a tough situation.
Remember, how you approach a problem is important, as well. There's an old saying that you catch ore flies with honey than vinegar. Try solving your problems with honey rather than vinegar, and you'll kiss the blues good-bye because you'll be more successful in life. And you'll feel better. You’ll get the depression help you need.
Depression is a social disease. Bump into a depressed person at the store and you'll wish you hadn't. On the other hand, optimism is very contagious. Try thinking about all kinds of matters more optimistically. Focus more on the positives and your outcomes will be more positive. By becoming a more positive person, you'll find others seeking you out and wanting to be with you.
Think about ADHD and relationships. By improving your relationships, you'll decrease your depression. And your depression will lift.
Cultivate the power of optimism. Learn to re-frame the negative view into a positive one.
In Sum
You can improve ADHD and relationships, manage an anger problem and decrease depression by being proactive, by tweaking your attitude and trying a few simple strategies.
Act now to understand your ADHD friend or colleague. Express your anger, as needed. Try seeing situations in a more optimistic way and you'll soon feel less depressed.
For more information on depression and anger, click here.